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中国首对同性恋者宣布结婚 遭受巨大社会压力
2010年01月13日 23:00中国日报网
中国日报网消息:英文《中国日报》1月13日报道:自从今年一月三日曾安全（音）和潘文杰（音）公开举行婚礼以来，正在度蜜月的他们承受了巨大的压力和痛苦。
去年十一月他们的同性恋关系公开后，这对同性恋夫妇一直承受着来自家人和朋友的白眼。
“我弟弟把我公司的所有资金冻结了，我妹妹警告我说如果我不和潘文杰分手，她就再也不叫我哥哥了。我接过来自亲人朋友的几百个电话，他们说为我感到害臊。”曾安全在四川成都一家灯光昏暗的茶馆里接受采访时说。
“但是我们彼此深爱，永远都不会抛弃对方”，曾安全在接受《中国日报》的采访时说。现年45岁的曾安全是成都的一名建筑师。20岁时他发现自己对异性不感兴趣。“那时我能怎么办？我一想到自己的性取向就感到羞耻。”
1983年他和一名舞蹈老师结婚，三年后他们有了一个女儿。
尽管他努力使自己爱上自己的妻子，但他对她始终都没有感情。曾告诉记者，“我抱着一个女人的时候感觉就像抱着一节树桩”。
于是，在结婚的第二天，他故意找了一份离家很远的工作，一个月只回家一两次。他说他对不起自己的妻子，他说自己的妻子尽职而忠贞。
当他们的女儿长大了并找到了一份好工作的时候，曾安全终于向妻子坦白。“她非常吃惊，哭了好几天。最后她答应给我自由。”这对夫妇于2009年2月10日协议离婚。
去年11月，曾安全在酒吧借酒消愁时，遇到了27岁的复员军人潘文杰，他们一见钟情。
“他阳光的、迷人的微笑把我迷住了，我被他温文尔雅的嗓音深深吸引。”在茶馆里，曾安全陷入了甜蜜的回忆中。
身高一米八穿着随意的曾安全身强体壮，颇富男子气概。
这一对恋人时常见面并且很快确定了关系。一个月后，潘文杰和他的女朋友分手，搬到了曾安全的房子里。
但他们遭遇了始料未及的压力与偏见。曾苦笑着，痛心疾首地说，“有时我甚至不得不向别人撒谎说潘文杰是我的养子。我们甚至搬回了我的老家、成都西部的一个偏远小镇，只因那儿没人认识我们。”
最后，这对同性恋情侣做了一个大胆的决定——在一家男同性恋经常光顾的酒吧结婚。这在成都可谓是前无古人。许多酒吧的客人看过他们的结婚照后，都惊奇地发现穿着白色婚纱的新娘竟然是个男人。
曾安全告诉记者，“在成都，同性恋很少承认自己是同性恋。他们不敢告诉自己的亲人和朋友，只是在酒吧和茶馆里见面。”
200多位朋友能接受他们的这种行为，被邀请到他们住处附近的这家酒吧参加婚礼。
“我们不再需要躲躲藏藏了。这次婚礼是我们人生中最幸福最珍贵的时刻。”这对夫妻笑着说，“只要能在一起，别人怎么看我们都不在乎”。
唯一令他们感到遗憾的是在中国现行的法律制度下他们领不到结婚证。“在法国、芬兰和英国有几百万男同性恋和女同性恋可以结婚，为什么我们就不能？”
这对夫妇说，能够结婚并取得合法的夫妻身份是中国所有同性恋者的梦想。他们估计全国大概有超过70万的同性恋者。他们认为，同性恋和异性恋间的唯一区别是能否生育小孩。这对夫妻表示，如果法律允许，他们将会收养一个孩子并且抚养孩子长大。
尽管没有家人参加他们的婚礼，但是他们的父母和朋友的态度，也由先前的强烈反对转变到现在的默许。潘文杰的前任女友李小姐甚至自愿为他当伴娘。
“我们的路艰难而漫长，但是我们绝不会放弃把自己当做正常的夫妻”，他们坚定地说。
青岛大学教授、艾滋病预防和同性恋专家张贝川（音）估计，中国大陆约有三千万同性恋者。
张教授警告说，由于同性恋者特殊的生活方式，包括在同性恋群体中拥有多个性伴侣和随意的性行为，他们感染艾滋病的可能性很大。
张教授批评到，遭受歧视是艾滋病在同性恋群体中广泛传播的主要原因。
由于同性恋关系既不被鼓励也不受保护，他们很难发展为稳定的关系。其结果是他们拥有多个性伴侣，比常人面临更大的传染艾滋病的风险。
张教授在1259名同性恋者中进行了一项调查，结果显示8.7%的被调查者在公开自己的同性恋倾向后被迫辞职或遭遇解雇，4.7%的被调查者则表示自己的加薪或升迁受到了影响，另有62%的被调查者在单位隐瞒了自己的同性恋倾向。
张教授和李银河等其他著名的社会学专家甚至呼吁在中国实现同性恋婚姻合法化，但他们的努力经常徒劳无功。
有人批评说，这种想法在当今社会过于超前。从世界范围来看，只有诸如瑞典、荷兰、加拿大和南非等小部分国家承认同性恋婚姻的合法性。（中国日报记者 黄志凌 翻译 刘江波 编辑 潘忠明）
China's first announcement on gay marriage suffered enormous social pressure
At 11:00 p.m. on January 13, 2010 China News Net
China News Net news: the English word "China Daily" reported January 13: Since January 3 this year, have security (sound), and Wen-Jie Pan (sound) wedding held in public since the honeymoon of their being under great stress and suffering.
In November last year after the publication of their homosexual relationship, which gay couples have endured from the White-eyed family and friends.
"My brother took me all the company's money to be frozen, and my sister warned me that if I did not, and Wen-Jie Pan split, she would no longer call my brother. I took a friend from their loved ones hundreds of calls, they said for me feel bashful. "safety in Chengdu, Sichuan has a dimly lit teahouse where said in an interview.
"But we love each other, will never abandon the other side", he told security, "China Daily" in an interview. The 45-year-old Tseng security is an architect in Chengdu. The age of 20 he found himself on the opposite sex were not interested. "At that time how can I do? Me think of my sexual orientation would be ashamed."
In 1983 he and a dance teacher married three years later they had a daughter.
Despite his efforts to make himself fall in love with his wife, but he has no feelings for her. Told reporters, "I am holding a woman feels like when holding a stump."
As a result, the second day of the marriage, he deliberately looked for a job far from home, only to go home once or twice a month. He said he sorry his wife, he said his wife, due diligence and fidelity.
When their daughter grow up and find a good job when the security had finally confess to his wife. "She was very surprised and cried for several days. Finally, she promised to give me free." Couple on February 10, 2009 agreed to a divorce.
In November last year, had security at the bar Jiejiuxiaochou encountered a 27-year-old demobilized soldiers Wen-Jie Pan, they love at first sight.
"He's sunny, charming smile fascinated me, and I was deeply attracted to his gentle voice." In the teahouse, the once security caught sweet memory.
Height of meter eighty who had been dressed in casual security has physical input on masculinity.
The pair of lovers to meet from time to time, and quickly established a relationship. A month later, Wen-Jie Pan, and his girlfriend broke up and moved and had a safe house.
However, they encountered unexpected pressures and prejudices. Had a wry smile, bitterly said, "Sometimes I even had to lie and say that someone Wen-Jie Pan is my adopted son. We have even moved back to my hometown, Chengdu, in a remote western town, simply because there nobody knows us."
Finally, this gay couple made a bold decision - in a bar frequented by gay marriage. It can be said is unprecedented in Chengdu. Many bars have seen their wedding guests, we were very surprised to find that the bride wore a white wedding dress turned out to be a man.
Once the security told reporters, "in Chengdu, homosexuality rarely admit they are gay. They do not dare to tell their loved ones and friends, only to meet in bars and teahouses."
More than 200 friends to be able to accept their act, were invited to their residence near the bar to participate in the wedding.
"We no longer need to hiding the. This wedding is the happiest life's most precious moments." This husband and wife said with a smile, "as long as together, how others see us do not care."
The only thing they regret is that in China's current legal system under which they could not receive a marriage certificate. "In France, Finland and the United Kingdom there are millions of gay men and lesbians can marry, why we can not?"
Couple that get married and get legal status of husband and wife is the dream of all homosexuals. They estimated that the country probably more than 70 million homosexuals. They believe that homosexuality and heterosexuality the only difference is whether inter-birth children. The couple said that if the law allows, they will adopt a child and raise your children grow up.
Although no family members to attend their wedding, but their attitude of parents and friends, but also by the strong opposition from the previous change to the current acquiescence. Wen-Jie Pan's former girlfriend, Miss Lee is even for him when the maid of honor.
"We have a difficult and long road, but we will never give up its own as a normal couple," they said firmly.
Qingdao university professors, experts in HIV prevention and homosexual Zhang Kaikawa (sound) estimates that about 30 million homosexuals in China.
Professor Zhang warned that the homosexual special way of life, including gay groups, have multiple sexual partners and casual sex, their HIV infection is very high.
Zhang criticism that discrimination is widespread AIDS in the gay community in the main reason.
Because homosexual relationships are not being encouraged not subject to protection, they are very difficult to develop into a stable relationship. As a result, they have more sexual partners than the common people face greater risk of HIV infection.
Professor Zhang homosexuals in 1259 conducted a survey showed that 8.7% of respondents in the open, after his homosexuality was forced to resign or face dismissal, 4.7% of respondents said their pay rise or promotion have been affected, and another 62% of respondents in the unit to hide his own homosexual tendencies.
Professor Chang and Professor Li Yinhe, and other well-known sociological experts have even called for China to achieve legalization of gay marriage, but their efforts are often futile.
There are criticisms that this way of thinking too far ahead in today's society. From a global point of view, only such as Sweden, the Netherlands, Canada and South Africa, few countries have recognized the legitimacy of gay marriage. (China News reporters Huang Zhiling and Fan Yi LIU Jiang-bo Editor Pan Zhongming)
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